MaxLife Podcast · Episode

Start With This- Habits of High Performers with Gary Klaben's Grit Blueprint

A West Point grad, endurance athlete, and elite wealth adviser walks through the six daily habits that keep high performers running, literally and figuratively, for decades. This one is about grit, humility, and the family structure nobody is talking about yet.

With Gary Klaben1h 27mGrit · High Performance · Family
The short version

Gary Klaben spent 55 years running, 51 hospital stays, and three decades watching families either grow or get destroyed by wealth. His answer to high performance comes down to six non-negotiables: sunlight, clean air, clean water, sleep, daily movement, and clean food. Grit, he argues, is not a personality trait, it is a muscle you build by refusing to stop when the pain tells you to. Humility is the hidden ingredient underneath all of it, because it keeps you curious, coachable, and genuinely useful to the people around you. The family village he is building on 67 acres is the long game: multi-generational living that lets every person pursue their purpose without having to choose money over family.

Key moments
What you'll take away

9 ideas from this conversation

01

Grit outlasts every other advantage

Gary watched West Pointers with brains, brawn, and discipline wash out. The ones who stayed had one thing: grit. 'You don't have to be good-looking, you don't have to have a college degree, you have to have grit.'

02

Six habits set the daily floor

Sunlight, clean air, clean water, sleep, daily movement, and clean food are Gary's six non-negotiables. Miss them and your edge disappears before the day starts.

03

Pain is mostly in your head

At 15, Gary ran through severe abdominal pain on a 12-mile run and it never came back. He learned that most of what stops people is a story, not a signal.

04

Failure is the curriculum

Every West Point cadet fails at something, often for the first time in their life. The ones who had never failed before struggled the most. Getting reps at failure early is a gift.

05

Humility is not a posture, it is a being

'If you try to be humble, you can't.' Gary has been reading the same book on humility for three years because it has to happen automatically, not as a performance.

06

Your decisions turn around and make you

Fifty-five years of consistent running was not a grand plan, it was one decision at 14 to run into his 60s. The habit built the person.

07

Isolation is worse than cold calling

Gary's bluntest line: isolation from community is harder than any professional grind. Your people hold you up when your grit is running low.

08

Money decisions are family decisions

Taking the higher-paying job in New York City is a money decision disguised as a career decision. Gary reframes it plainly: you chose money over proximity to family.

09

Purpose is the non-negotiable of the village

'Everyone who comes here should be able to pursue their purpose in life, and we will provide the support, resources, and money so they can do what God put them on earth to do.'

Full show notes

Start With This- Habits of High Performers with Gary Klaben's Grit Blueprint

The six habits of high performers Gary actually lives

Gary Klaben is 68 years old, has three concurrent heart conditions, has been hospitalized 51 times, and still runs six days a week. When people ask how he keeps performing at that level, he does not talk about morning routines or productivity apps. He talks about six things he calls non-negotiables: sunlight, clean air, clean water, sleep, daily movement, and clean food. "If you're just operating at a high level all the time because your faculties are good, then when things come along, you just have that little bit of edge," he says. These are not hacks. They are the floor. Miss them and the edge disappears before your first meeting.

Gary started running at 14 after reading a book called LSD, Long Slow Distance, written by a 62-year-old who claimed you could run well into your 60s if you trained that way. Gary made a decision at 14 and has been running for 55 years. The six habits did not arrive as a system, they accumulated because he was living and feeling the results. Sleep improved his performance. Clean food sharpened his mind. The system built itself around the commitment.

How to build grit: the West Point definition

Angela Duckworth's research on grit started, in part, with West Point cadets. Gary lived it. Every single person who goes through the academy fails at something, and for many of them it is the first time in their lives they have ever failed. "The people who had never failed before had an unbelievably difficult time," Gary says. The ones who made it through were not the strongest or the smartest. They were the ones who kept going when the ruck march gave them blisters, when the cold calls went nowhere, when the paper was due at 2:00 a.m.

Gary's definition of grit is not complicated: it is picking yourself up and persevering when the odds are against you, specifically at the moment when most people stop. He ran through severe abdominal pain at 15 on a 12-mile run, decided he was not going to stop regardless, got through it, and the pain never came back. "Most of it's in your head," he tells people who ask why he never gets injured. That is not dismissiveness, it is a lesson he earned by testing it on his own body for five decades.

Mindset shifts for entrepreneurs who want to stop burning out

Gary spent years making cold calls in financial services. After four months, he was the only one left out of seven who started. He remembers sitting in a parking lot telling a colleague that some days cold calling was harder than Ranger school. The difference between him and the six who quit was not talent. It was the refusal to treat the headwind as a reason to stop.

Ben Laws draws the parallel to biking: if you keep going long enough, the headwind becomes a sidewind, then a tailwind. Gary's version is simpler. "You're paying too much attention to this thing here, and you're not going here," he says, pointing from the obstacle to the direction of travel. The mindset shift is not positive thinking. It is redirecting attention from the blister to the finish line.

For entrepreneurs, Gary adds one more layer: you cannot do it alone, and pretending you can is its own kind of failure. At West Point, if your buddies are not there for you and you are not there for them, nobody graduates. The same is true at Strategic Coach, in a startup, or in a family. Isolation, Gary says flatly, is worse than cold calling.

Grit and resilience start with humility

Gary has been reading the same book on humility, Humility of the Heart by Cajetan Mary da Bergamo, for three years. He keeps going back because he believes humility is the one attribute that keeps everything else working. Every saint, the book argues, had one thing in common: humility. Not intelligence, not discipline, not charisma. Humility.

The catch is that you cannot manufacture it. "If you try to be humble, you can't. If you try to read about humility, you can't. It's a being." What Gary does instead is read about it so that examples of it stay close, and then he tries to let it happen automatically. In practice, humility shows up as curiosity, treating the person in front of you as someone who probably knows more than you do, the same way Ben turned cold calling into a research project on human behavior and started booking 14 to 18 appointments while everyone else got two.

West Point leadership lessons and the family village

The family village did not start as a real estate project. It started in 1991 when Gary drove home after signing estate documents for a client and felt sick. He realized the children were not ready for the money, and that transferring it would destroy them. That moment reoriented his entire practice around one question: how do you pass along not just the money, but the grit, the values, and the purpose that created it?

Three decades later, Gary and his wife found a 67-acre property with five families now living on it, his daughter and son-in-law, his grandson, his in-laws, and two brothers with their spouses. Nobody was recruited. They asked to come. The one non-negotiable Gary set for the property: "Everyone who comes here should be able to pursue their purpose in life, whatever that is, and we will provide the support, the resources, the money, whatever is necessary so they can pursue what God put them on the earth to do." That is the whole model. Everything else is logistics.

Quotable

Lines worth sitting with

If you want to be successful, the number one thing is grit. You don't have to be good-looking. You don't have to have a college degree. You don't have to even speak well. You have to have grit, and grit will get you over most hurdles.
Gary Klaben
Every single person that goes through the academy will fail at something. The people who never failed before had an unbelievably difficult time. They could not understand how this has happened.
Gary Klaben
If you try to be humble, you can't. If you try to read about humility, you can't. If you try to understand humility, you won't. It's a being. It's not something you can manufacture.
Gary Klaben
Everyone who comes here should be able to pursue their purpose in life, whatever that is, and we will provide them with the support, the resources, the money, whatever is necessary so they can pursue what God put them on the earth to do.
Gary Klaben
Free · No. 27 of the series

I want to build real grit, not just push harder until I break
Reflection Worksheet

The episode is 1h 27m. This worksheet is fifteen minutes. The fifteen minutes is the part that changes anything: five questions from this exact conversation, pointed at your business and your life. Answer them on paper while the ideas are still fresh, and they become yours for good.

  • The Thing You're Carrying Alone
  • Why Asking Feels Worse
  • Who Would Hold You Up
  • Humble, Not Small
  • One Hand Out, One Hand Up
You get this worksheet plus the full 75-worksheet binder, free.
5 prompts, 1 pagePrintable, binder-readyFree, no spam
Open the full worksheet →
Clips · grab & share

Short highlights from the episode

Short clips from this episode are on the way. Watch the full episode while we cut them.
The guest

Meet Gary Klaben

Gary Klaben on the MaxLife Podcast

Gary Klaben

West Point grad, Ranger-qualified, wealth management firm owner, and founder of the family village model

Gary Klaben graduated from West Point, earned his Ranger tab, and spent more than three decades building one of the most client-centered wealth management firms in the country. He has been hospitalized 51 times for three concurrent heart conditions and still runs six days a week at 68. He is now pioneering a model of multi-generational living he calls the family village, designed to let every family member pursue their purpose with full community support.

Questions, answered

Questions & answers

What are the six habits of high performers?
Gary Klaben's six daily non-negotiables are sunlight, clean air, clean water, sleep (at least seven hours), daily movement six out of seven days, and clean food. He has maintained these for over 55 years and credits them with sustaining his mental sharpness and physical performance despite three concurrent heart conditions. These are not optimizations, they are the baseline that makes everything else possible.
How do you build grit?
Gary's answer is to keep going at the exact moment you feel like stopping, on the ruck march, on the cold call, on the run. Grit is not a trait you are born with; it is a muscle built by accumulating reps of pushing through discomfort. He also argues that failing early and often is essential, because people who have never failed have no framework for getting back up.
What is grit in business?
In business, grit is the willingness to keep making cold calls after everyone else has quit, to stay in a market through the headwind, and to serve clients as human beings rather than transactions. Gary was the last of seven people standing after four months of cold calling, and clients eventually told him they hired him because he would not give up. Grit in business is simply refusing to stop before the results arrive.
What are the West Point leadership lessons that apply to everyday life?
The most transferable lesson Gary took from West Point is that isolation kills performance and community sustains it. No cadet graduates alone, your buddies hold you up when your grit is running low, and you do the same for them. The second lesson is that failure is not an anomaly; it is part of the curriculum, and learning to recover from it early is a competitive advantage.
How do you develop grit and resilience?
Gary points to three things: build physical habits that create a daily win before the day starts, expose yourself to failure early so it loses its power over you, and stay connected to a community that will hold you accountable when you want to quit. He also argues that most of the pain that stops people is mental, not physical, and that learning to distinguish between the two is a skill you can train.
What mindset shifts do entrepreneurs need to stop burning out?
Gary's core shift is moving from pushing toward goals to being pulled by purpose, knowing who you are first, then letting the right resources and people find you. The second shift is treating the hard stuff as the point, not the obstacle. The third is recognizing that you are in the human being business, not the human doing business, and that the moment you lose that distinction is the moment the work starts to hollow out.
Share kit

Help spread this episode

Ready-to-post copy for guests and fans. Grab a caption, pick a clip above, and link this page.

Copy any of these word-for-word, or make them your own. They tag the show so it shows up when you post.

Social caption — long
Gary Klaben has been hospitalized 51 times, has three heart conditions, and still runs six days a week at 68. On the latest episode of the MaxLife podcast with @MaxLifeBenLaws, he breaks down the six daily habits of high performers that he has lived for 55 years straight, his real definition of grit, why humility is the one thing every saint had in common, and the multi-generational family village he built on 67 acres so every family member can pursue their purpose without choosing money over family. If you want to build unshakable grit and long-term success, this conversation is the blueprint. Listen now: https://maxlifecoach.com/episodes/start-with-this-habits-of-high-performers-with-gary
Social caption — short / quote
51 hospital stays. 55 years of running. Three heart conditions. Gary Klaben on the six habits of high performers and what grit actually means. Full episode with @MaxLifeBenLaws: https://maxlifecoach.com/episodes/start-with-this-habits-of-high-performers-with-gary
Email — share with your audience
Subject: You need to hear this one

Hey,

I just listened to Gary Klaben on the MaxLife podcast and wanted to send it your way.

Gary is a West Point grad, Ranger-qualified, has been hospitalized 51 times for three heart conditions, and still runs six days a week at 68. In this episode he walks through the six daily habits that have kept him performing at a high level for over five decades, what grit actually looks like in practice, and the family village he built on 67 acres so every person in his family can pursue their purpose without having to choose money over proximity.

It is one of the most grounded conversations I have heard on what high performance really requires.

Full episode here: https://maxlifecoach.com/episodes/start-with-this-habits-of-high-performers-with-gary

Think you will get a lot out of it.
Copied